Well, summer is here. Its actually almost over! Which makes me quite sad. But I am excited for the new school year all the same!
We've had a pretty exciting summer so far. The boys and I flew to Washington for 2 weeks so that they could visit with their dad. In the beginning, 2 weeks of a mommy vacation sounded terrific. But as the time came closer, I was dreading it. It was not a carefree 2 weeks that I had anticipated. I was an emotional wreck! I knew that the kids were being taken care of just fine. It was just that I wasn't with them. I didn't know what their daily lives held. It was awful! Completely.
I haven't cried much at all since moving away from Washington. I think maybe once when I really missed my friends. But other than that, there haven't been many tears. But the day that I found out my kids went to my old house where there dad lives with his girlfriend, I sobbed. I hate the fact that he took them there. This was the house we lived in as a family and had our lives together. And now he lives there with his new family. He has changed their rooms and all their stuff. It broke my heart. I know that Joshua doesn't probably think much of it now. But I can only imagine what it might do to him down the road. I struggle with him feeling 'replaced' by this new family. I know that I have been replaced, and quite easily by the looks of things. But seeing my kids replaced is just heart breaking.
Once we got back from WA, we packed up for a road trip to West Virginia! My mothers family was having a reunion and so we trekked on down and had a great weekend with the family. It was great spending time with my brother Joel and his wife Kristen and baby Jack and my parents. And it was a bonus to see the relatives too! We had about 24 hours of driving total over the course of the 5 day weekend and my boys did amazing. And as a bonus, I got a nice tan. :-)
So now we count down until school starts. I start up college in the fall and the boys start a week later. The way that my schedule is working out, I won't be able to fit work in there, so I am going to be on a major budget crunch. Not that I don't 'try' to do that now.....
Joshua is starting first grade. It amazed me that my 5 year old is going into first grade! I can't believe how grown up he is. And now my little baby Lucas is starting school too! That is freaking me out. I will cry. Dang, it'll be bad. He'll be riding the bus to school and spending a full day at preschool. He will have a one-to-one aid with him all day, everyday. She will be helping him with everything from feeding to his therapies and participating in classroom activities. He'll be receiving speech 5 times a week and PT/OT 4 times a week. I can not wait to see the progress he'll make! He is already succeeding with therapies at home being seen half that amount. It's going to be amazing!!!
Well, I will hopefully be updating more often. I have been holding a lot of feelings in lately that need to get out, or they might burst. So be tuned in for that one! LOL