2009 Reflection

With New Years, there is a chance for a new beginning. I usually have a resolution that I try not to put much faith in. They usually fail, especially for me. Typically, it weight loss. And typically, I fail. Again, I want to be skinny come 2010, but I guess I should really just want to be healthy for my family. Because really, will I ever be skinny? (Not likely)

With new beginnings, there is a chance to go look back over your year and remember. We've had our share of hard times. Lucas being in the hospital; Josh being laid off; our fair share of sickness. But there was also so many great things about 2009.

We bought our first house!
My big brother got married!
Being healthy more than sick!
My Joshua turned 4!
My Lucas made it to his 1st birthday!
My husband turned 30!
I turned 29 (YIKES)!
We had so many blessings!

Its been a great year. I am SOO looking forward to 2010. We already have a lot planned. Josh and I will be celebrating our 10th anniversary. Its amazing to think that we actually made it to 10! We're going to Mexico to celebrate- without children
My parents are planning a visit and I can't wait to show them our new house!
I will be celebrating my 30th birthday and I am really excited. I am hoping to have a girls weekend in Seattle. Yay!
I am hoping that my brother and sister in law will be visiting also. And maybe bring some exciting news that they'll be having a baby! (I CAN NOT WAIT to be a an auntie!!!)

I can't wait to see my children grow. Its sad that they grow, but more exciting to see them change.

I had a quote from 2008 that I thought was perfect for that year. But as the years keep coming I realize its a great quote for our entire life.

I never thought I would cry so much, love so hard and be so blessed.

Thank you for reading my blog and following our life.
I hope you too have an amazing 2010!

Today I Bawled

As I played with Lucas tonight, I just started bawling. He was laughing. I was smelling his perfect baby smell. I looked at his beautiful face and started crying, hard. I was hit hard with a feeling from way, way back. When I was first faced with the difficult pregnancy and when Lucas was first born I wasn't filled with love for him. It came after about a week when we were really together. Then I really fell in love. But tonight, I was just in shock that I could have ever doubted my love for him. I can not imagine him any other way. I can not imagine my life any differently. I love him and accept him fully, just the way that my God made him. He is perfect. He is beautiful. I am so in love with that little man, I can not contain myself. I am so thankful for his sweet nature, peaceful spirit and loving face. The way that he looks at you and lights up. The way he suffers from pain or problems, and after, he loves you like no other. I am so blessed, beyond measure with him. I am so thankful God gave him to us. I am so happy to be his mommy. I love my Lukey.

Four!!

Well I can't believe it, but my little baby just turned 4! Where did the time go?

Thinking back, Josh and I tried to get pregnant for quite some time. After losing one baby, a deployment to Iraq, Joshua was here. After a great pregnancy, and a lot of cheeseburgers, Joshua arrived. He was 9 days overdue. I was induced and after 5 hours and 19 minutes of labor, and no epidural, Joshua Paul was born. At 2:24am, weighing 8lbs and 7oz. He was such a beautiful baby and even his daddy thought so. (He thinks every baby looks like an alien.) He was a great eater, a great sleeper and a little angel.

Joshua started walking at 10 months, running at 11 months, and he's been unstoppable ever since. He started signing and knew almost 80 signs when he was 18 months old. He can count to 20, knows his ABC's and can still sign most of them. I am so proud.

Joshua brings light to my life everyday. We have our ups and downs, but he is so full of love. I laugh so hard with some of the things he comes up with. I can't wait to see him grow and change. I know that he can accomplish so much with his life. There are so many possibilities. Its amazing to be a mother. Its such an amazing experience that I will treasure my entire life.