Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Hmmm, who am I?

Well, its official now. OK, it was official a few weeks ago when I actually paid the tuition. But now its really, really official. Ha. I got my JCC student ID today. Its quite strange. I feel so weird about my position in life right now. I feel like a 20 year old college kid, with 2 children and 30 years of life experiences. Its weird. Really weird.

I can not believe that I start classes Monday. Its very surreal. It doesn't feel like its really happening. But come Monday, I'll be sitting there with a new notebook and a literature book in my lap. Hmmm, I should probably find out where my class is......

There is a lot happening in my life and I've pushed back a lot of other things that need to be dealt with now. We are finally seeing specialists for Lucas. Most of them are in Syracuse, which I fully expected. Not a huge deal, except, I really don't have any time to actually go to Syracuse. An hour drive there, 1-2 hours with the doctors and an hour back. Um, yeah, I just don't have that kind of time these days. Its a little scary looking at my pending schedule.

I've contemplated quitting my job. I really enjoy working there. Its fun, and I am surrounded by a lot of happy people. Its a calm environment and its stress free. BUT, I don't make much money there, and I don't actually work many hours. And by the looks of my schedule, I might be needing those hours in the week to be with Lucas and doing therapies and appointments. The problem is, I hate to make it inconvenient for them and I don't want to disappoint anyone at work. I really like them and I know that I am wanted and needed there. Its silly really. I don't know what to do.

So, I guess we'll see what happens in the next few weeks. All I know is that I CAN do this. I can juggle a lot of stuff. I've done it before- it was just different things. Hopefully I don't drop anything.....

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